May 9, 2023
by Eric Stillman
On January 3rd, 2018, I received an inquiry email to our website from a woman named Gaia that read: How do you feel about skeptics? I’m working on talking with Christians about why they believe what they believe. Would you like to discuss over coffee at NewLife?
This was certainly a unique email, the only time in 17 years of pastoring NewLife that an atheist reached out because they wanted to understand my beliefs....Keep Reading
Posted in: Death Tags: Death, Friendship, Gaia McDermott
October 11, 2022
by Eric Stillman
A common refrain I have been hearing from older generations of workers is that younger employees require what feels like an unhealthy amount of affirmation and praise simply for doing their job. Whether this stems from helicopter parenting, the “everyone gets a trophy” mindset or from being used to getting “likes” and “follows” for everything you do online, it does feel like, more than ever, any criticism is seen as doing violence to another person. And that is a dangerous mindset to have....Keep Reading
Posted in: Relatonships Tags: Love, Friendship, Criticism
July 26, 2022
by Joe Barone
The basement apartment, equipped with a single gas space heater, frameless bed, fan and a TV was rudimentary at best. A life adjusting to a very recent divorce and separation from my precious 3-year-old daughter would be much harder than acclimating myself to these austere accommodations.
Anger, failure, self-pity, loneliness, and throw in a measure of depression while you’re at it, were my every day friends. Visitation time and activities with my 3-year-old Lena Marie were all that I really cared about. Work was a diversion and always provided the opportunity to make new friends....Keep Reading
Posted in: Evangelism Tags: Salvation, Friendship, Joe Barone
April 30, 2019
by Eric Stillman
Very rarely do I use this space to link to someone else’s writings, but I wanted to share with you a story I read recently that left me in tears, challenged, and inspired. It was written by Skip Hollandsworth in the Texas Monthly (can’t say I ever read that before) about an unlikely friendship between a formerly homeschooled evangelical Christian girl named Jaelyn and a Muslim exchange student from Pakistan named Sabika, and the school shooting that changed their lives and families forever....Keep Reading
Tags: Love, Friendship
February 26, 2019
by Eric Stillman
There is a dangerous myth floating around our culture that the healthier you are, the more you do not need anyone. In counseling circles, therapists use words like “codependent” and “enmeshed” to negatively label people who are too reliant on others for their own functioning. While there are certainly ways we can negatively relate to and need others, the truth is that a stubborn independence is just as unhealthy. We were created for relationship, and we need others if we are going to live a healthy and fulfilled life....Keep Reading
Tags: Friendship, Discipleship
September 19, 2017
by Eric Stillman
There is a dangerous myth floating around our culture that the healthier you are, the more you do not need anyone. In counseling circles, therapists use words like “codependent” and “enmeshed” to negatively label people who are too reliant on others for their own functioning. While there are certainly ways we can negatively relate to and need others, the truth is that a stubborn independence is just as unhealthy. We were created for relationship, and we need others if we are going to live a healthy and fulfilled life....Keep Reading
Tags: Discipleship, Friendship
July 26, 2016
by Eric Stillman
One of the challenges of pastoral ministry is that there are very few aspects of the job that can be checked off as complete. There is a sermon to preach every Sunday, and a newsletter to put out every Tuesday, but most of the work is ongoing: discipling people, training leaders, caring for struggling people, and so on. When there are 150-200 people who call NewLife their home, and only 7 days in a week, clearly decisions need to be made and priorities need to be set, because you can not give everyone all the time you would like to give.
One of the statements I heard early in my ministry, which has helped me tremendously, was by Mike Yaconelli, a pioneer in youth ministry....Keep Reading
Posted in: Love Tags: Love, Friendship
January 12, 2016
by Eric Stillman
There is a dangerous myth floating around our culture that the healthier you are, the more you do not need anyone. In counseling circles, therapists use words like “codependent” and “enmeshed” to negatively label people who are too reliant on others for their own functioning. While there are certainly ways we can negatively relate to and need others, the truth is that a stubborn independence is just as unhealthy. We were created for relationship, and we need others if we are going to live a healthy and fulfilled life....Keep Reading
Posted in: Fellowship Tags: fellowship, Friendship